Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
