physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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