I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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