Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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