Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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