Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
We left the knife in your bed.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize