honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
