Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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