I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
