I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
