God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Randomize
