i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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