How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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