how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
