you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
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