Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Need sex. Gaining weight.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
