And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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