All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
i dont even know how to be here
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize
