You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
