rhymes with "ouble enetration"
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Randomize