so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
