So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
