Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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