I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
