Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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