she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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