Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Four minutes until I can fart!
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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