Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I need a beard to bite.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
