Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
