He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize