I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize