you traded sex for a burrito?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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