I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
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