Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
