it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Who died my cat blue again?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
