Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
