Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Dear god my vagina.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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