There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
We're not piercing ourselves today.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
