It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
