Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Are we still banned from the library?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
