I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
