apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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