I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
