I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
