i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
