I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
