i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
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