i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
