is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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