super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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